Sleep Is Different for Women Than for Men, and No, It’s Not Women’s Fault.

Any woman who’s ever taken home a paycheck is likely familiar with the gender pay gap. Regular readers of The Persistent may also be familiar with the gender health gap, the gender reading gap, and the myth of the gender ambition gap. (And coming from The Persistent this Thursday—the gender cooking gap!)

But just when I thought we might—at least for the time being—be safe from more pernicious gaps, enter our latest plight. 

It visits us in the dead of night, in our wildest (interrupted) dreams, quietly and infuriatingly: the gender sleep gap. 

For years I’ve been convinced that I need more sleep than my husband. Informal surveys of my female friends and acquaintances confirm that: seven or eight hours, which—according to credible healthcare guidelines should be plenty—often just doesn’t feel like enough.

As hot, humid weather envelops much of the northern hemisphere, nights can feel like endless sweaty marathons of tossing and turning, interspersed with sips of water and trips to the bathroom, but no chance of that deep and peaceful slumber I so desperately need.

Lying awake at night, I’ve wondered, is it all in my mind? Am I just less resilient than my husband?

Lying awake at night, I’ve wondered, is it all in my mind? Am I just less resilient than my husband? (He seems to be doing just fine with his sleep.) Am I simply a complainer? Am I eating the wrong thing? Doing the wrong exercise? Popping the wrong melatonin pills? 

In a quest to assuage my doubting mind, I decided to find out. 

It didn’t take long to establish that yes, sleep really is different for women than it is for men and no, it’s not women’s fault.